When women hurt women in the workplace

We need to address the elephant in the room. Women are often the biggest challenge to other women progressing or succeeding in the workplace. The “Pull Her Down Syndrome” (PHDS) is a significant issue that remains largely unspoken. You might think that this topic has been sufficiently addressed, and surely by 2024, this shouldn’t still be a problem. But it is.

Is it not awkward that after six decades of celebrating women’s achievements and progress in various fields, honouring the courage and contributions of women, raising awareness about ongoing issues faced by women in South Africa, promoting gender equality, and empowering women, PHDS is still prevalent not only in the workplace but also in broader social settings such as communities and social clubs? It’s unfair that so many women work so hard to get to where we are professionally and continue to strive, only to face oppression from other women.

Let’s talk about the oppression of women by other women in the workplace. Isn’t it unfortunate that in 2024, we still have women who oppress others for no reason? Many women suffer from anxiety and have mental breakdowns at the hands of other women. Why? What happened to pushing for women to occupy top positions so that they can open up opportunities for other women to thrive in the workspace? Instead of lifting each other up, we are being oppressive and destructive to one another.

Research shows that women are more likely to experience workplace discourtesy from other women than from men. This phenomenon, sometimes referred to as “Queen Bee Syndrome,” can significantly impact mental health and career progression (Journal of Social Issues). The Harvard Business Review reports that women who succeed in male-dominated environments often distance themselves from other women, potentially to avoid being associated with negative stereotypes about women in the workplace. This behaviour not only hinders individual progress but also undermines collective efforts toward gender equality.

It is so unfortunate that in the modern workplace, women are often the reason for the anxiety and mental breakdowns of other women. Some women feel threatened by another female and push them away rather than bringing them closer to learn from each other and grow together. “When women support each other, incredible things happen. But when they tear each other down, the damage is profound,” said Sheryl Sandberg, highlighting the critical need for solidarity among women.

Imagine entering the workplace as a young professional, honestly trying to make a difference, only to be bullied because your female boss finds you intimidating. This happens because you bring professionalism, knowledge, and expertise to your work. When you really care about what you do and bring positive changes to the workplace, you may be hated for it. Changing the status quo can make you a target; people might be impressed by your ethics, communication, style, and competence, yet you become a target.

Madeline Albright once said, “Women need to work twice as hard to get half as far. We should be allies, not obstacles, to each other’s success.” This sentiment echoes the frustration and disappointment many women feel when they realise that their biggest adversaries are often their female colleagues.

Alice Walker wisely noted, “The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any. Women must realise that power is not a limited resource and support each other in claiming it.” Recognising and embracing this truth can help dismantle the barriers created by PHDS.

How much longer, ladies? We have been celebrating women’s struggles, achievements, and initiating empowerment progress only to become gatekeepers and secret brand ambassadors of PHDS. It is time for a change. We must recognise and address the impact of women oppressing other women in the workplace. By supporting and uplifting each other, we can create a more inclusive and empowering environment for all. Let’s break the cycle of oppression and work together to build a future where women thrive alongside one another, celebrating each other’s successes and paving the way for the next generation of female leaders.